Hearted Youtube comments on Psychology with Dr. Ana (@AnaPsychology) channel.

  1. Telling a child that they owe their parent for childhood care is based on the belief that children don't have the right to that care, that parents were doing them a favour by raising them. Nope, nope, nope.
    16000
  2. Flirting is communicating your attraction with plausible deniability
    14000
  3. Don't have a boyfriend: problem solved. šŸ˜Œ
    9100
  4. The way short content has almost universally led people to assume everything is an excerpt of something more substantial... the fake podcasts are insane. They just look to the side and pretend they are making eye contact with someone who isn't there... while they say things like "Women are the cause of 92% of all divorce. That's why I sell supplements."
    8200
  5. According to the internet an intellectual is basically anyone who can own their opposition the hardest in a ā€œdebateā€
    8100
  6. All couples donā€™t necessarily fight, but there are naturally going to be disagreements. The way you handle these disagreements are crucial to the health of the relationship.
    6600
  7. Ahhh yes, as opposed to ADHDDBT where you just start with an 8 and then apologize repeatedly whether or not they took it well...then try that five or six more times during a conversation.
    5400
  8. I totally understand if someone falls in love with someone else. You can't control your feelings. BUT, you should always be honest and break up with your significant other instead of keeping the illusion, lying and being in another relationship at the same time. I have never been cheated on, all I want is for men to tell me straight away when they don't want to stay with me anymore. It hurts, but at least I don't waste my time with a cheater and I can move on. Also: please, consider open/poly relationships if monogamy isn't meant for you. Stop deceiving people, be honest with yourself and the others. People: please stop "accepting" such behaviours. You don't have to forgive a cheater, you don't have to settle because you're afraid of being alone. Accept solitude, embrace it, and you will never settle with someone unworthy of your love and trust.
    4700
  9. Still havenā€™t had an argument with my boyfriend after about a year and a half. So much trust, good communication, understanding, and honesty! I didnā€™t know a relationship like that could exist until I met himšŸ˜
    4100
  10. lmao my girlfriend used this tip on me!! I AM SMITTEN LIKE YOUR KITTEN
    3900
  11. Itā€™s easy to get up in the feelings rather than look at reason. For me, I only start a relationship with someone if they actively add to my life and make it better. Not just to have company or someone to snuggle with. Though those are nice. I look at it as picking a team member in helping to build the best life possible.
    3600
  12. Yes, letā€™s talk more about the green flags in relationships! I think all too often, the focus is on the red.
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  13. I wish I could marry male version of me
    3100
  14. She said ā€œunless you wanna experience the heartache for growthā€ I feel EXPOSED
    2900
  15. Iā€™ll never forget when my professor in college embarrassed /ā€œcalled me outā€ for being quiet in front of the entire class. It made me not want to come back to class. Funny though because he would always talk about how important diversity is, but I guess that doesnā€™t apply to introvertsā€¦
    2700
  16. I do think it's possible. My husband and I are together for 12 years this month and know each other even longer. We never had a fight, we do have misunderstandings sometimes, but it never lead to arguing or anger. We communicate A LOT about our thoughts and feelings though. He's always been my best friend and we often act so lovey-dovey and flirty, that our kids think it's embarrassing šŸ˜… We already knew our darkest sides and saw each other at our lowest points before we started dating. I fell in love with all of this.
    2600
  17. This was definitely needed. I have been dating a woman who gives much less than me. Once I started giving less she started showing up more then I started matching her energy only for her to fall back again so now Iā€™m back to her giving less and Iā€™m doing the same. Iā€™m hoping eventually Iā€™ll just completely move on from her because I really donā€™t like the feelings that I canā€™t give freely. Iā€™d rather go somewhere where my natural energy is reciprocated more.
    2400
  18. Just want to clarify that bunnies are committal animals that typically will bond with life partner :)
    2400
  19. ā€œWe choose partners who we believe are on our level.ā€ That hit different šŸ˜Æ
    1900
  20. I have an expert witness in my family who appears in court cases to give expert evidence. One of the rules is if you honestly are not qualified to answer something you are required to say "that's outside of my expertise". For instance someone might have 40 years as a mechanic. But they are not a computer programmer so if asked "do you think that car X has well written code for its computer parts" the mechanic might say "not being a programmer that's outside of my expertise.". That's common and it's not held against the expert to do that. It isn't any gotcha moment that a lawyer steers for al all.
    1900
  21. I cheated for one simple reason. I was afraid of failing my exam....... I was in grade 3. (T_T)
    1900
  22. This quarantine has me looking at the really ugly parts of me, but I need to.
    1700
  23. My ideal partner would 1. have a similar ethical philosophy/moral code to my own, 2. have near-universal humor seeing as I laugh at almost anything, 3. have similar love languages to my own, 4. be committed to improving themselves everyday and grow as a person, and lastly, just to make it a smooth top 5 list, 5. my ideal partner would know their own self-worth/personal value
    1700
  24. This is how everyone talks in reality shows like love is blind and the ultimatum. Itā€™s possible to use therapy language without sounding pretentious. Ana, you donā€™t have to worry because you do not give off ā€œtherapy speakā€. Youā€™re articulate in an extremely compassionate way.
    1700
  25. I definitely am in the "respect is treating people with human decency" camp and not the "respect means treating someone like an authority figure" camp
    1600
  26. That " Doctoral Candidate" hits different
    1600
  27. I have an unpopular opinion: I think that motherhood is tricky because whenever it's going to be good or bad partially depends on people around you, your partner, family, friends and how much they will be involved. And I feel plenty of mothers have terrible time because we simply leave then in isolation dealing with hardships that they wasn't supposed to deal with alone in a majority of human history, and then people are surprised why moms are so pessimistic.
    1600
  28. 7:48 "Couples that have broken up multiple times rarely ever make it in the long run." So now we know what the fate is for Ross and Rachel's relationship....
    1500
  29. Thanks for this Ana! I always have a hard time connecting to people and be vulnerable with them. My relationships to other people are always between levels 3-4 and 5-6 even to my friends of seven years. Its really hard for me to cultivate meaningful relationships. The very few people I was able to be vulnerable with have become my partners or romatic interest which ended up failing. And I realized that I just wanted to have a friend I can be vulnerable with, like a real friend, but being a highly introverted and independent person it's challenging for me to be that open to someone and establish a deep connection with them. Sometimes its easier for me to confide my problems and feelings to strangers :(
    1500
  30. Most people get together of circumstances And mistake it for being in love . Thatā€™s why itā€™s good to work on yourself have self love have self worth and not settle based on your circumstances or based off he /she loves me and I donā€™t wanna be alone I donā€™t think Iā€™ll find anyone that will love me like she/he would etc.
    1400
  31. An old friend told me once, when you caught him/her cheating ONCE (in any form), more likely they were already doing it before your eyes know it. Been there.
    1400
  32. I learned the hard way that sexual compatibility was for more important than I expected. If you have a partner with proclivities you're not willing/ comfortable indulging, they might seek it out elsewhere.
    1400
  33. I think the answer to "Why do you assume the parent did something?" is also in part because every parent messed something up. Parenting is incredibly difficult and you will screw up. That's okay. Having a healthy relationship with your adult children involves admitted your mistakes and being accountable. I find it really telling that they act like they couldn't have done something wrong, because even the best parents will absolutely have done things wrong.
    1300
  34. my main issue with the term daddy issues is how it blames women (daughters) for something that is the man's (father) insufficiency as an irresponsible parent
    1300
  35. I remember watching your videos on couples about 1 year ago and applying all of your advices. Iā€™ve been with the same guy now, 2.5 years strong and we have a full trip planned in Europe together in 8 months. Thank you so much for your videos, it really really helps :)
    1300
  36. From my own experience, I believe that narcissists and sometimes people who just have low esteem, are more likely to cheat as a result of their constant hunt for validation. My ex did exactly what you said, when he wanted out of the relationship he cheated on me because he knew I wouldn't forgive that, even though before that happened, he would threaten me with suicide or use violence against me when I wanted out. The weird thing is, I feel like I could forgive cheating in my current relationship. Humans are weird like that Edit: good luck with your exams!!!ā¤ļø
    1200
  37. I found this so unsurprising I was surprised
    1200
  38. The "runs tongue across teeth" mannerism is just one of those things that can only ever exist in a mafia boyfriend fanfic
    1200
  39. "This is not the girl I know." AND HOW. My mother never said this, but my parents' resistance to getting to know me as an adult was what led to estrangement for 15 years. You have absolutely named everything my mother was willing to do and why I love her, which rekindled our relationship. She listened and acknowledged. That simple.
    1200
  40. ā€œIf at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.ā€ - WC Fields
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  41. Something you said really struck me as true but somewhat incomplete: "Abuse is loving yourself so much, that you don't care about what the other person feels." This can go into the opposite direction too. Some people can become so self-hating and even self-destructive, that they lose sight of how their partner or loved ones might feel. They get consumed by their self-hatred.
    1000
  42. valid means your feelings are there and need to be sorted through. I don't take it to mean 'my feelings are true and the story im telling myself about them is fact'
    1000
  43. Just noticed the switch from ā€œpartnerā€ to FIANCƉ!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!! ā¤ļø
    1000
  44. Wonderful, Ana. I'm a keynote speaker on human connection, and I'm often asked by audience members, "What do I do when someone tells me about their job/hobby/major and I have no interest in it?" I always respond, you don't have to be interested in it. You just need to be interested why they're interested in it. My favorite framing is to give yourself a new title: Collector of Stories. You job isn't to care about the stories you hear or even find them interesting, just to collect them. And you'll be shocked when we allow people space to share their stories with us, how often we actually DO find them interesting. Long time viewer, first time commenter :) Deeply appreciate your work, and I've shared your channel with my wife who is a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in kids.
    1000
  45. After watching this and looking at my own relationship objectively, I realize that I have been self sabotaging, I'm the one that came into our relationship already w trust issues, and our relationship is actually really strong. It's making me cry bc I think for me it's really hard to see past the emotion but when I look at only the facts, omg it's like I've made up arguments all on my own. I'm the root cause or something. Lol how frustrating that must be for my counselor šŸ˜‚ but this video was eye opening.
    1000
  46. Married 18 years. It's possible! Great tips/ideas to help couples stay there as much as possible.
    991
  47. This is related to pseudo-intellectuals but also the people who, even if they are educated on one specific topic, they act like they're educated and qualified talk about every topic in general on a factual basis even if it's in a totally unrelated field
    979
  48. Every time I watch videos like this I feel like Iā€™m an alien cosplaying as a human
    967
  49. I'm surprised she puts out all this quality information and analysis for free!
    961
  50. step one: don't date a cheater
    955